Some Musings on Rasputin

I finished the book on Rasputin. It was interesting, thought-provoking, and yet I'm not really sure what to make of it.

There are a lot of different layers to this. Rasputin himself, of course. The rumors and conspiracy theories surrounding him. The effect of that on Russia, and the Romanov dynasty. How much of it was Rasputin himself, or the tsar and tsaritsa, or I don't even know what.

The author did a good job of portraying the complexity surrounding him, I think. I also think I keep trying to place this in my own context, and run into some definite cultural differences.

What do I mean by that? Well... if I were to consider someone holy, I would expect to see certain things. Great compassion, for example.  A lack of the pettiness and fear that is all too common in we more worldly people.

And... maybe this is Peter's influence on the Roman Catholic Church, but... not a lot of sexuality? Or if it's there, it'd be the wholesome kind. (Explaining that would take a whole other blog post, I think. The most conventional example would be a devoted husband or wife, but what I suppose it's really about is the difference between making love and f***ing. And I don't associate 'making love' with the sort of creepy, borderline predatory, behavior that seems to be documented w/regards to Rasputin. He doesn't seem to have crossed that line, so far as we can tell over 100 years later, though there are numerous accounts ascribing some sort of hypnotic power to him and that adds another layer to the incidents described.) Plus there's the drinking...

The reason I say that's a cultural thing is that apparently there's some sort of history of the starets, which I don't quite understand and may be getting mixed up with other things, but seems to allow for a sort of holy peasant, and part of that may include drunkenness? And even rudeness? Idk, I definitely seem to be lacking the cultural context to understand that.

He sounds like... well. Like most people. A mix of good and bad. Except his mix was particularly dramatic, with the 'good' seeming almost holy and the 'bad' making others view him as a con or a fraud.

I can almost see why the tsar and tsaritsa dismissed so much of the criticism of Rasputin. From their perspective, I'm sure it seemed like yet another example of the sort of BS people believe about those in power. The sort of thing you don't give credence to by addressing. Except that, in this case, that seems to have been a mistake.

So I also find myself thinking about what the best way of handling it all would have been. Should have been.

I also wonder, sometimes, why there was so much blatant lying going on. Like... I get how rumors can get exaggerated and twisted. Anyone who has played the childhood game of 'telephone' should know that.

But to deliberately say something you know is false?

I said before that I kept wanting to label people 'good' and 'bad', except it sometimes seemed like it was more a matter of 'a mix of black and white' and 'a mix of even more black, though still some white.'

To add another layer to this, I can't help comparing the events over 100 years ago to the world of today. Oh, not in any obvious way. But that feeling of conspiracy theories growing, and taking on a life of their own? Of the truth not mattering in the slightest?

Of everything balanced on a knife's edge, ready to tip one way or another at any second?

Yeah... that's eerily familiar right now.

So, anyways. Finished the book. Liked the book. Lots to think about.

And, of course, I started another one. This time it's about Stalin, because I've found I sometimes get interesting insights when I read a different book on a somewhat similar topic. Not sure how quickly I'll read it, but that tactic is already showing itself... as I try to place Stalin's childhood experiences and some of the comments on Romanov policies towards Georgia (and a bit of foreshadowing about the fall of the Romanovs) into the context of Rasputin and the history I just finished.

Edit: oh, and what the heck was ip with their police? And administration, in general? Like, the police were investigating Rasputin. Then stopped. Then started again, and followed him for quite a while... But only some of this seemed to be done with the knowledge of the tsar and tsarista? Clearly they weren't as in control as you'd think for an autocratic system. And even though that seems like an obvious statement, in some regards, I always thought that had more to do with the challenges of one (or two) rulers administering an entire nation and not so much that the police seemed to do their own thing? 

Oh, and Merry Christmas

Since that article caught my eye, and I wrote a post for the first time in ages, I suppose I should give a quick update. And wish everyone a Merry Christmas.

Seems everyone's schedules were better suited to celebrating Christmas early, so I was visiting the fam yesterday and a few days before, but came home last night. My poor puppy has been on antibiotics since Thanksgiving, and making sure he gets his daily dosage has been a real pain. (also worried about whether it'll do the job, since we didn't get a definitive diagnosis, and the costs, but for now he's mostly fine).

Being home alone for Christmas day itself is kind of weird, but I called various relatives (even though I just saw some of them) and it's been okay. Got to talk with my sister about the latest Star Wars movie, played some Christmas music, caught a few good Pokémon..

So quiet, but kind of relaxing. 

There's some potential changes in the works, maybe, but I don't want to post anything public until it's more likely to happen. 

So - Merry Christmas everyone :) 

Alienation

I don't necessarily agree with his analysis of the causes here, or the proposed solutions, but I think this article captures something very important about what the average person experiences in the world today -

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/amphtml/josephbernstein/in-the-2010s-decade-we-became-alienated-by-technology?__twitter_impression=true

One of the best quotes:

“Alienation online — and perhaps offline as well — is not ingrained,” he wrote. “It comes from a reflexive assumption that powerful political and media institutions don't care, won't listen, and will not respond.”

Don't care?

Won't listen?

Yeah. And like that study a few years back, about how much the wealthy are able to influence policies and law (and how little the average American does. As shown by how there's still been little to no change on hugely popular policies like changing marijuana laws), too many people feel like what they think doesn't matter.

In a weird way, that's what some Trump supporters feel. Weird in that they then support a guy who doesn't really have their best interests at heart, but I guess I should give credit for making them feel heard or something.

Anyways. 

Alienation. We are seeing the effects of mass alienation, and those feelings seem to manifest in a variety of dangerous ways. 

I just wish that the people who could do something to change that - the ones that don't seem to care, or listen, or respond - saw that for the problem it is and actually addressed it. 

Doggie Health Problems

So over Thanksgiving, the people who were housesitting for me had to take my youngest dog - Phoenix - to the Vet ER.

He had a fever of 106, was pretty much not eating or drinking. Or moving.

After a few days with an IV, and antibiotics in the IV, he was doing much better and I was able to bring him home... but we didn't really know what the root cause was.

He'd tested positive for something (neospora, I think?), and the antibiotics clearly helped...

But when he was first brought in they said he had almost no white blood cells. Or platelets.

Like, possible diagnosis had ranged from tick-bourne illnesses, to genetic immunocomprise issues, to fighting off a severe infection somewhere.

At a check up last week, they'd checked his blood and had seen the white blood cells returning, so that was good.

But today, well... Today they said he was running low again.

Which means that we haven't found the root cause, and he's not really okay. He's fine, for now. Still on antibiotics (and trying to avoid eating them when I give them to him). He's acting more like his old self, energetic. Playful.

But it will probably come back unless we run more tests.

And here's the thing. I don't like putting a price on my dog's life, but I'm also not comfortable committing to paying whatever it will take to fix this. Because I've already spent over $1000, more like $1500-2000, on his care and treatment.

If I knew that doing a ~$700 CT scan would find the problem, and that treating it would only be a bit more, I would totally do it.

But we're talking about tests, when we don't really know what's wrong in the first place. Maybe that will find it, maybe it won't.

And then, once we do find it, we have to treat him. Which could mean surgery (if it's an infection in his head, for example). Which would be... what? Another $1000?

I'm already annoyed that this set me back (wanted to spend this whole year paying off debts, and all that. Now that I've graduated and am gainfully employed.) If this had occurred in another year or two, I think I'd have been fine. But... right now? It's like the cliche - two steps forward and one step back.

There's always some unexpected emergency.

So I have this possibly gigantic bill coming. Or maybe not. But at what point should I say it's too much?

Ugh.

He's so young, though. And otherwise seems in perfectly fine health. Like, how can I not agree to doing whatever it takes?

Some days...

Some days I really wish I didn't have to struggle within these constraints. (And yes, I know I'm already better off than most.)

What would it be like, to have the resources to do what I truly want to do in life? What would it take, to get there?

And can you get there, while still being a good person? ('cause, you know, very many of the ones we hear about in the news don't seem to have managed that. Seriously.)

Barr's Disturbing Statement on Policing Communities

Plenty of people have been talking about how wrong Barr's comments are, but nobody is quite capturing the sheer stupidity of his remarks.

There are a lot of complex issues here (as always, when discussing police and minority communities - which is primarily what he's talking about, even if he focused more on protestors) and I don't want to diminish them...

But government monopoly on violence is part of what they do.  And if you utterly abandon policing communities, they will come up with their own way of policing themselves. 

It could be an anarchists dream, I suppose. Or you could see organized crime fill in the gaps (like in Mexico), but outright abandoning communities creates space for that sort of thing.

In other words, this is how you lose your monopoly. 

Idiots. 

Why are so many of our so-called leaders so utterly lacking in wisdom?